Heavy Cake

What do you get when you add 31 candles to a delicious, homemade birthday cake? A very heavy cake, my friends, because you have officially tipped over the hill.

Yes, I turned 31 on Monday. Birthdays don't make me sad. They do, however, make me reflective. What am I doing with my life? What have I done with my life? What can I do differently? It's as if the turning another number on my internal clock makes me realize how truly fast time flies. I feel 22. I act 24. And I look, well, old enough to never get carded. My Wii age is 48. Numbers are scary, huh?

So, to commemorate my birthday, I thought it might be nice to make a list of things I know now that I would have NEVER have known at 21.

1. Women need to stick together. Friends are what makes the journey worthwhile.

2. Why movie stars, especially those that do nude scenes, do NOT breastfeed. Sagging is not sexy, although it is the milk of life for our sweet babies.

3. Men will never come around to our way of thinking. They do not change nor should we.

4. Gym memberships are never worth it. Sweating with a bunch of other people, all running in circles, doesn't make you happy. It makes you depressed.

5. People you love do break your heart. You may break some, too. Hating people for things that are out of our control is a waste of time and energy. Move on.

6. Being a mother is the greatest and hardest job in the world. I am in charge of shaping another life and I can't even get myself put together some days.

7. You are what you eat. Big bellies don't lie.

8. I'm becoming my mother. All the things I thought I would never say or do because my mother did them and it got on my last nerve. I'm there. I'm her.

9. I need God in my life. I need the comfort and the unconditional love.

10. Age is a silly thing. If it defines your outlook, you're silly, too.

Thanks for all those birthday wishes, friends. You're the best. I hope you know it.