It's official, folks. I'm a celebrity.
I traveled to Cabo San Lucas, Mexico, for an extended weekend and was greeted at the resort with margaritas and a gift basket. When I turned for my first look at the ocean, it was the bluest water I had ever seen. Whales even floated by all weekend. I took long bubble baths in my room, which also overlooked the ocean. Quietness began to surround me. Sun settled on my skin. My life slowed down to the sweet cadence of Mexico time. It was amazing.
What was more amazing was the time I got to spend with Jamie, my very best friend in the world. She's the reason I was in this paradise. She got hitched. And, she invited me, bless her heart, to stand up next to her for her sunset wedding. It felt like old times to be with Jamie and her family. It's like we were 16 again and giddy with what life had to offer.
Finally relaxed, it was time to go home and get back to my life. While I missed by boys and hubby something crazy, I didn't miss the hectic pace that forever marches forward. Life is nuts here. I plan it, organize it and make it happen. I clean it, cook it and pack it. I write it, seal it and send it. Always more, always more. No rest for the weary, especially if you wear the name tag "mommy," "wife," or "woman."
I never realized how much I didn't like the pace of my life until I escaped it for awhile. I'm having a really hard time jumping back in. I don't like how it is, as sad as that may sound. Change, however, takes more work and I'm not sure I have enough energy. What do you put on hold? What do you cut out? What do you leave behind?
If I were a true celebrity, I'd get boozed up and make my life hazy. I'd travel to exotic locations further away from reality. I'd leave behind what is real and maybe pick it back up 20 years later in rehab. I'd get weirder, too. I'd also hate all those people with a normal life, who get the opportunity to know their kids and own a really messed up dog (p.s., I pulled one of my hair ties out of the dog's butt this afternoon...it's such a pleasure owning Zeke).
As it turns out, I'm just me. So, I guess I just have to take it one day at a time and try to see the beauty in what's around me, whether I'm by the ocean or exhausted, snuggled up with my kids. I can do this. I know I can.